Have Cocktail, Will Travel:
Dumptruck Rides the Good
Times Biker Party Circuit

//Have Cocktail, Will Travel:
Dumptruck Rides the Good
Times Biker Party Circuit

Have Cocktail, Will Travel:
Dumptruck Rides the Good
Times Biker Party Circuit


Dumptruck is an emcee, voice over actor, bouncer and biker leather-model who loves roller derby, fast bikes and long rides. He’s committed to delivering a good time for all the participants in every event that he emcees. Some people have a party, but with the Dumptruck, he is the party. Being a gypsy biker is also about making friends and finding new adventures. At the conclusion of the 5 day, 1,000 mile 2015 Geico Hot Bike Tour, Dumptruck and his new friends Ben and Patrick, rode from the end of the tour in Billings, Montana to Ten Sleep, Wyoming.

Ten Sleep is located in the Big Horn Basin in the western foothills of the Big Horn Mountains, about 26 miles east of Worland and 59 miles west of Buffalo… which is a long way of saying it is in the middle of nowhere. It’s not always easy to find this town of three bars, a gas station and 260 people, because drunken locals are known to change the sign below the town’s only gas station.

HaveCocktail-saloon3 - Ten Sleep Saloon

Dumptruck and crew parked their 3 Harleys at the Rodeo corral and pitched their 3 hammocks off the stands for some bandit camping. After everything was settled, they walked over to the Ten Sleep Saloon.

HaveCocktail-Rodeo1 - bandit camping

One thing that had presented a challenge during his work on the road was the money. It always was late, and it always was arriving after he was starting his new job, sometimes several states away. So when the boys showed up in Ten Sleep, they were hot, hungry, had a powerful thirst and only $60 between them. Now $60 for these fellas would hardly cover their bourbon tab. Unfortunately, the ATM at the Ten Sleep Saloon was out-of-order and the only other ATM was in the gas­ station across the street, and it was closed.

What to do? They pooled their resources and sweet-talked the Helen, owner/trustee for a loan and mixed it up with a sea of plaid shirts, boots, and ten gallon hats. They ate like “biker” kings, sang songs… “I was drunk the day my mom got out of prison. And I went to pick her up in the rain.” “But before I could get to the station in my pickup truck, she got runned over by a damned old train!” And they danced until their feet hurt.

HaveCocktail-saloon2 - Ben - Patrick - Helen

In the morning, they found the ATM, ate breakfast and paid their bill. The locals weren’t sure if the “dirtbag bikers” would make it back. And there was a lot of speculation about would they or wouldn’t they… Helen said, “I just knew in my gut that you all were honorable and would be back this morning.”

If you have been to Sturgis, the Hot Bike Tour, Philadelphia’s Ride of Distinguished Gentlemen, AIM Expo, Milwaukee Rally, UFC, Las Vegas Rollercon or the Lucas Oil NHRA Nationals at Brainerd International Raceway, then you have probably heard or seen him working his emcee gig or riding his custom punched-out Sportster named Creature.

Earlier this year, Creature was overhauled for Dumptruck’s end-of-summer to early-fall ride. On July 20th, he fired her up, hit the road and didn’t return until October 27th.

Now when you are gone for 3 months and a week, and have ridden 7,500ish total miles, you don’t always think of a Sportster as your mode of transportation. But Dumptruck had just had the Creature finished by Steve Koso of Burbank Moto, a motorcycle parts & accessories, service, fabrication & paint shop at 1819 W. Burbank Blvd. in Burbank, CA, and he was itching to ride. The truck had designed it go anywhere and see anything; Koso had built it to romp.

The Creature is a 1989 Harley-Davidson Sportster 883 Deluxe and punched out to 1200cc. In order to decide on what was needed, a lot of hours were spent in consultation with Koso and on the J&P Cycles website.

The bike received V4 cam and pushrods from Andrews Products, copper oil lines, and new front and rear sprockets for highway traveling.

HaveCocktail-Creature2 - day

“When I dump it in 4th gear I’m comfortably at 70mph, and it will run up to 104mph with room to spare… which I may or may not have tried,” explained Dumptruck.

Speed Merchant provided the 39mm Mid Glide Speed Triple Trees. Dumptruck sourced stiletto shocks and scrambler handlebars from Burly Brand. A call was made to Speed Dealer Customs for gas and oil caps, grips, mirrors and throttle housing.  A set of Biltwell Murdock Handlebar Risers polish off the front end.

Stock FLH 9 spoke wagon wheels are fitted to Allstate Tires’ The Dirtman donuts. These tires are a replica of the vintage Grasshopper Tire that was popular decades ago.

When riding, Dumptruck carries about 60 pounds of gear. His leather of choice is 5 Ball Leathers’ Sleeveless Jack Shirt. It is a vest with shirttails and comes with gun pockets, side pockets and chest pockets. “I like leather; I’m more comfortable in leather and like the smell, the way it feels and, well, the smell.”  For disclosure purposes, Dumptruck is 5 Ball Leathers’ Super Model. You can see his ads in Cycle Source Magazine and see his 5 Ball Leathers gear on the J&P Cycles website.

During his 3 month odyssey, Dumptruck lost his license plate in MN, his license in Sturgis, and broke up a fist fight in Sturgis; his camera ended up in San Diego, and he lost one lens on his prescription glasses. He also broke a rib when hit by a car in North Dakota.

While traveling home from Houston near Ft. Stockton, TX, his tire blew at 80 mph after he ran over a screw. That put the bike into a two wheel slide, and only the judicious use of the front break and heroic body leaning brought the bike to a stop. A change of underwear was also required – ed.

HaveCocktail-Creature3 - FlatTire

If you are itching to see the Creature in person, then you’ll need to attend the Progressive International Motorcycle Show in Long Beach, CA, on November 20 -22, 2015. It will be entered into the J&P Cycles Ultimate Builder Custom Bike Show.

If you are itching to see the Dumptruck in person, then you’ll need to attend a biker party. You can’t miss hearing him. He delivers his dulcet tones like the rock-and-roll disk jockey Wolfman Jack. And just like the Wolfman, he howls and growls and throws out snazzy phrases and comments that make you giggle.

While partying with the custom bike builders at AIM Expo, Pat Patterson of LED SLED said that hanging out with Dumptruck is like having a happy old dog barking at everything he sees from the back seat. He is never far from the good times.

HaveCocktail-saloon - Making friends with cow girls HaveCocktail-friends4


Dumptruck’s website is ISpeakGood.com.

By |2015-11-05T10:30:23+00:00November 6th, 2015|Categories: Uncategorized|2 Comments

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  1. t. Shire December 30, 2015 at 8:12 am

    Sounds like a great ride. Just did a 1000 mile ride on my ’96 883 Sportster,, but it took 8 days. Largely because we put another 500 miles by boat. We were on 6 different islands in the Philippines. A 200 mile ride here takes 6-8 hours due to traffic or road conditions. You can rarely get up to 60. It was fun and looking forward to riding in upper Luzon next year. Have covered many of the other islands already.

    • Dumptruck January 20, 2016 at 10:49 am

      That’s awesome! Island hopping w/ a Harley. I’ll add that to the list I need to do before I die. So cool.

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