My Internal Dialogue

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September 24, 2013 | By: Brett Koranda

Internal DialogueI’ve had this idea, along with a lot of dissociated thoughts, rattling around the ol’ bean for a while. These mostly occur to me as I ride, especially on longer runs. I thought it might be fun if not personally beneficial to share them from time-to-time. I’ll confess I’ve toned down the verbiage as some of my dialogue is a bit “saltier,” as my grandma would’ve put it, than is probably permissible on this blog. Hey, thanks for your indulgence! Feel free to contribute a few of your own.

• Not much is funnier than when you see a guy toss his leg over a pristine scoot, fires up, gooses the throttle a few times for effect, makes sure everyone is paying attention to him, stomps it down to first, one more goose, starts easing out the clutch…then kills the bike with a huge CLUNK. It’s especially hilarious when he then looks down at the left side of the bike then the right as if a mechanical failure drained the cool from his moment.

• On a foggy morning – turning on your headlights is for EVERYONE ELSE on the road to see you and avoid ramming into you over the crest of a hill.

• Here’s a secret we’re privy to that full-time cagers don’t know…the ratio of ditch-concealed roadkill to visible carcasses is easily 3 to 1. This is especially evident during the current month-long heat wave we’ve been under.

• I try not to complain about the heat too much (as I’m writing this it’s 97 degrees) because it’ll be gone too soon…then my complaints will be flyin’! However, it’s the price I’m willing to pay to remain in my beloved Midwest.

• If we’re on a four-lane and for some reason I’m going too slow for you to follow me, but too fast to pass, just slow down or get going and get out of my blindspot! Make a commitment.

• That junebug to the forehead felt like it was launched with a slingshot.

• Don’t get caught up in wanting to wave at passing riders. If I have a passenger and am rounding an ever-tightening curve in a 30 mph headwind, I’m probably not going to wave back. It doesn’t mean anything; I’m just a little preoccupied with the task at hand.

• The MoCo seems to be drawing a lot of fire in the blogosphere and these days. The complaints run the gamut from griping that they’re stuck in the past or adding too much modern technology…on and on it goes. I love it; it’s restoring the independent outsider mystique to loyal riders, defenders and owners.

• If you’ve never ridden by a lightly fog-blanketed hayfield at sunrise, you have something to add to your bucket-list.

• The term “bucket-list” is overused. The movie just wasn’t that good.

• Riding on a hot day and passing through a stand of woods or into valley and hitting one of those pockets of cool air never ceases to make me smile.

• Is it just me? It seems our community goes way out of its way to use our pasttime (hobby, passion – you choose your term) to serve others and do some good in the world. You sure don’t seem to see many video gamers, for instance, get together and do what they do in order to honor a veteran, a fallen first-alert hero, put a toy in a needy child’s stocking or provide an unforgettable outdoor experience to a disabled child.

• The phrase “it is what it is” doesn’t explain a damn thing!

I better stop here. Let me add my own disclaimer. These opinions are mine alone and aren’t meant to represent any position taken by J&P Cycles or its management. I mean really, can a company have a single opinion? If it could, I’d be spending a lot less time in meetings!

Comments (4)

It was summertime, riding season my Bro and I was thinking up new ways to challenge ourselves and get into the good kind of trouble. Every year (summertime when school is out) we would think up different races to have at the Lake. We were just a bunch of B.U.G.’s (Big Ugly Guys) young and looking for excitement. Trying always, to coming up with new ways to kill ourselves. Well sometimes some of us got hurt, from time to time, but nobody ever died. Back then we always wear our helmets, well most of us did. Now, Leather Jackets have armor and protective padding in the proper areas.
So the object of our latest race was the Sand Pit. We live at the lake most summers. Friday night we would pack the truck and head 110 miles north to the lake. Stay for two nights and three days, to come home Sunday and think about a new work week. We did this every weekend. In summertime I would stay for three months. Then back to school. The Sand Pit was 5 miles down winding dirt roads though the middle of dense wood. This is where I learn to ride. My best Bro and I bought a Hodaka 100 cc Super Rat which we modified with an expansion chamber. In second gear you could not keep the front on the ground. So the race was to start the Gas Station / Grocery Store and finish at the top of the Sand Pit. Sounds simple? Huh? Well the Sand Pit was huge. It was ½ a mile wide and ¾ of a mile long. The top from the bottom of the Pit was ¼ mile with at least 65° incline and the last ten feet was damn near straight up. If you did not know how to manipulate the last ten feet you would wind up flat on your back and your bike on top of you. (I told you some of us got hurt) If you knew the Sand Pit and you practice it, you knew how to get to the top. So I shared this bike with my Bro Jeff, but, it was my turn to race. There were about 10 of us that day. It was race as fast as you could till you get to the Pit then first one to the top wins.
The problem with the Hodaka was top speed was about 55 on level dirt road. The advantage was she got to 55 mph in mere seconds. I was in second place when we got to the Sand Pit there was a Honda in front of me. The trick to the Sand Pit was hit the bottom at full speed, down shifting as you gain altitude. Remember in 2nd gear I could not keep the front wheel on the ground. The Honda hit the last few feet and flipped over sprawling back down the hill. Second gear pulled me up and over! Every time I hit the last 10 feet I was in second gear.

Interesting that some one mentioned a signal light staying on. I got so tired of my brother riding behind me and blowing his horn to tell my signal light was on, I bought two 90 db. buzzers at Radio Shack and wired them into signal light wires in the headlight shell. Buzzers work fine, except they can not be left inside behind the head light, as the won’t be heard. I now have them in a small vinyl pouch with a velcro closure attached to my handle bars. Perfect, and cost about $10 using some wiring I had on hand.

Enjoyed your internal dialogue.

How many miles will your turn signal stay on?

I love a cold pocket of air too. Very refreshing on a blister hot day.

How long will I have the knot on my forehead where that junebug hit me?

You often smell roadkill before you see it. And just as quickly the odor is gone.

A bug that hits your shield or glasses right in front of your eye WILL freak you out for a bit.

Seeing your shadow in the ditch at sunup or sundown is unreal. Because you either have a great trip ahead of you, or you have just completed a great trip.

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